If you are interested in learning about the healing power of the heart of the horse, this book will inspire you to learn more. The author takes you on a self discovering journey that she least expected. In a compelling true story, she discovers the horse’s natural way of healing her heart with the gift of love. It has made her realize that there is much more to healing with horse heart then she ever thought possible and so therefore continues her journey on a quest in helping people to open up to the power of the horse’s heart. I hope that you enjoy this captivating story and help to spread the word that animals play the most important part on this planet earth to help us heal ourselves back into loving ourselves and others unconditionally.
The First Chapter of my book is below
This book started in 2005 as a journal about horses and people. It includes my experiences that came up in my healing sessions while working on horses mostly. The idea of this becoming a book only came to me at the end of the year in 2007. I thought that perhaps people might enjoy reading about how horses have natural healing gifts, that is available to any open-minded individual that was willing to learn.
I decided to let it take its course and the book completed itself.
My journey over the years has led me back to the healing wisdom and guidance through the energy of the horse. For centuries, they have always been deeply connected to Source. Once I connected to the horse’s trust, I discovered a whole new world of communicating with them that I never knew I had.
They are willing to help us only if we are willing to show up with them, energetically. At some level, horse lovers know this. I’m remembering what I believe I’ve always known, but was not aware of it, until now.
The names of the people who participated in my sessions have asked not to be mentioned by their real names. With the exception of Mary Jo Bulbrook, Ali and Oops, the songwriters and Standing Bear.
I also want to acknowledge the work of Energy Medicine that Mary Jo Bulbrook has taught me which is described at the beginning of chapter three. I would not have known my gift with horses if it wasn’t for the courses I took with her. Thank you.
I've included the first chapter for you to read
The last couple of months had been pretty stressful for me. Trying to find work that I was able to handle physically was definitely a big challenge. The stress was taking a toll on my body. A friend suggested that I try Healing Touch. It was a new experience for me. It helped me to focus on the things in my life that needed change. The session was about an hour long. For the first time in my life I had never felt so relaxed. It was something that I had never experienced before and wanted to learn more about the work. The woman that worked on me introduced me to this energy work and told me that she was having a workshop. She suggested to me that I was more than welcome to come and decide if this was something I might be interested in learning. In March 2003 I had my first course in Healing Touch and I basically took to it like a duck takes to water. The person that got into this work nine years ago is not the same person I see in the mirror today. As I still continue to change and grow due to the tools I gathered with this magnificent gift from the Universe that we all have in us.
Since learning about this energy work, I have been able to focus more on my vision and for this planet. I’m sure my life would have been different if I had been introduced this work when I was younger, but the Universe has it all planned out for us..
My job is to show up, which is what I work at everyday. I don't want to go back to the person that was on the table back then. Today, knowing what matters to me is my priority and the horses are very willing to help me with that. I am very grateful that they are part of my life. This book is my attempt to share with you how horses have changed me. I hope it will bring insight to you about ways that you can connect with your spiritual guidance, call it God, the Universe, Great Spirit, a horse, whatever works for you, just like it has with me.
My second passion is reading books that teach me how to become a better person. Oprah has guided my journey since I was in my twenties. Went she got into the spiritual shows, she invited a guest, Eckhart Tolle…who explained a lot about the living in the now of life…..I was so glued to his words that I had to learn more about him. So I bought a few of his CD’s . While I was listening to “Entering the Now” by Eckhart Tolle, I was reminded at how people try to understand things that can't be explained. While watching a movie last night, " Charlotte's Web." it was pointed out how spiders can somehow weave a complex web, that even man cannot duplicate with all the materials that we have on this planet. They still have no way of understanding how a tiny spider can make such a complex structure. When I think of the energy field that each living thing has around them, it is sort of like the spiders web. Things will get trapped in our energy field and we carry it around us. It doesn’t belong there. We are not aware of it, what it is about or how to get rid of it. The spider has the awareness that something is in the web and removes it immediately. We, on the other hand, have not been taught how to be aware of the things in our web. Eventually, the things in our "Web of Life" drags us down, if we are not willing to be open to challenge ourselves to see if there’s something there. The words, " Oh, what a tangled web we weave." comes to my mind.
I've been learning about myself through personal development courses, as I continued on my journey towards self-discovery. I was doing my healing work with my mentor and we made a connection in one of the sessions that made me realize that I still have a connection to horses. When I was young, my dad had bought my sister a pony. She was very interested in learning about horses and was very good at drawing pictures of them. It was hard to go to school each day because we would rather be riding. When I did want to ride, I had to ask my sister's permission. It was on her terms and her rules, since it was her horse. I remember now how much I felt connected in the moment and how much fun we had. We went through a few ponies until we grew into a normal size horse. I realized not too long ago that I had never allowed myself to grieve my sister's horses when Dad would sell them for a bigger horse and that my inner child was in desperate need to reconnect again. Things started to come into my life that made me re-think my connection to them and what it was about. I pursued it with curiosity and was about to discover another new way of seeing life.
I was doing some sessions on people by this time since I had completed a few courses in Healing Touch. One session I did was somewhat different then all the others I had done. I was using a technique that I had never done before and I didn’t know why it came to me.
It started in February of 2005, I was doing energy work on my friend and received some guidance to do a particular treatment, which I thought was a way to shift the energy that was stuck and help it to move faster, in a very vigorous way. I would move my hands rapidly over the body. I was still learning about doing this work, but also trusting that what was being shown to me to do, was what I needed to do for the person on the table. She was OK with it, so I kept doing it.
Later on in that week, things started to show up in my life that would have me thinking about horses. When I would do my own healing work with my mentor, my meditations brought up some very deep feelings of pain and loss about something. People would talk to me about horses or I'd see a story on television that reminded me of when I was young and rode ponies, and it was apparent that it had to mean something. So I decided to meditate on it and with the help of my energy practitioner, I discovered that I was to find a horse because I had a feeling it had some kind of lesson to teach me. With my practitioner’s help, I found a ranch that was helping people to learn the energy of the horse. I knew this was the place to start. I called the owner and told her what was happening with me. She was very open in hearing about what I was experiencing and told me to come. I made an appointment and drove out there in the middle of February, setting my intention of not having any expectations of what I was about to see or do.
It was a wonderful place with lots of horses, I think about twelve. They gave me clothes to keep warm because it was extremely windy. We went out to the barn and she started to explain to us the things that we'd be doing. I was a bit disappointed that we were going to ride bare back, since I hadn't been on a horse in years. Oh well, go with the flow I told myself. My first lesson was learning how to brush the horse. I was instructed to be very gentle because the horses are very connected with what is happening around them. I paid attention to that and brushed gently brushed my horse. I got up on his back and the instructor guided my horse along with the others in the woods behind her property. It wasn't the ride I had anticipated, but I placed my disappointment aside, knowing I was here to learn something. She started to teach us to read the energy of the horse and see if we could make the horse stop and go forward without the guidance of our voices. We circled around the trees with her in front of me leading me with the reins. I respected that, because it was her horse and she wasn't sure about my ability in handling a horse. I was okay with that and knew it wasn't about her or the horse.
We came back to the barn and I got off. We all walked into the barn to debrief our ride and talk about what we had learned. When she asked me what I had got out of it, I told the group that I was surprised to learn that I could learn to ride a horse energetically and that I needed to be focused at all times when I was riding. Also that the horses can sense the energy around them very well. It was surprising to me that I had got all this information about energy in just one ride.
I drove home, and wondered what I was going to learn from this trip, with the horse I rode today. I started to journal out my day's events and suddenly realized that maybe it was telling me to be more gentle with the energy, stay focused on what you're doing and stay connected to my intuition so that it can guide me in the work I do on the table with healing. My God, was that it? Was that the lesson I was to learn from the horse? Could I get this message through a horse? All these questions came to my mind: "How could a horse teach me this? Why was I guided there? What did it all mean? I was confused with excitement lingering all around me. I decided to learn more about how horses live and why I felt guided to them. I looked on the internet for books on horses and energy. A book that got my immediate attention was called "Riding Between the Worlds," by Linda Kohanov . I started to read it and was glued from the very beginning. I read half the book in one day. I was surprised to learn that I knew little about what the horse could teach me. I promised myself that I would learn more.
Here was this new world that I didn't know existed. Horses, as spiritual guides. A new and very interesting concept to me. Nobody ever had mentioned this to me when I was a kid. Suddenly I wanted to watch every movie about horses that I had missed when I was a child. I went out to get all the movies I could find to watch and loved all of them. I also promised myself that I was going to go riding all summer long but ended off track with my horse journey due to too much work, until December. I had been focusing a lot on my healing journey and wasn’t thinking about the horses with the intensity I had in the beginning of the year. Writing and meditating somehow made me realize that I had some grieving I had not done as a child for my sister's horses when my dad would decide to trade them for a bigger horse. My mother would tell me that it was nonsense for me to have tears for a horse that wasn't mine. I felt I had no right to cry over my sister's horse, so I held in the tears. Today I realize I had a much deeper love for horses than I ever realized. The tears started to appear for the loss of my sister's horses and I let them flow. I felt silly crying for an animal that I knew way back as a child, but I thought if the tears are here it must mean they are ready to heal. I felt I was honoring their gift of love by showing how they made me feel inside. I started to collect things with horses on them. Pictures, books, blankets, cowboy hats, stickers anything to help my inner child heal. It helped me to process what I was feeling inside and allowed me to love horses again. Ironically, I would find things with three horses on them. The number three has been in my awareness for some time. Symbolically, it represents manifestation.
After I was able to leave a job that was physically stressful and demanding. I started talking to my friends about going riding again. My friend Myrna, who lives half an hour away, grew up with the love of horses too. She was talking about getting some horses again. One day. she ran into a man she knew as a child, who now owns lots of horses and was willing to let Myrna board two horses at her house. Myrna said "Sure, I have a friend that wants to get back on the saddle. That would be great. "
So on December 31, 2006, I was on my computer just looking up stuff when the phone rang. It was Myrna. She wanted to know if I wanted to go riding with her to Jake's house so she could see how the horses might handle themselves in their own environment." What time do you want me there?" I enthusiastically asked. It took me half an hour to get on the road. While on my drive down there, I had the "Awful Feeling" rush go thru me, that feeling that something was going to happen. I quickly blocked out that thought, not wanting it to ruin my day.
We arrived at Jake's house with all the horses on the front lawn. I thought that this was just too cool. How lucky was he to be able to get up each morning and see all these animals out of his front window. It felt so good standing with all of them around us. The horses we chose would be the ones that Myrna would be getting. We brushed them a bit, put the bridles on and saddled them up. By then, my toes were a bit frozen so we were invited in the house for some fresh muffins and coffee to warm up a bit before we headed out. Jake's girlfriend and another man started talking to us about energy work, and we were drawn right into this conversation that seemed to come out of the blue. Jake's girlfriend was telling me that she was writing a book, It was the second or third time I was hearing this. I paid attention again to that idea. We came out of that house excited that we had met two more people that were opening up to the idea of energy work. As I was on my way out of the house, I got a glimpse of the farrier approaching the gate to get a horse. I saw him energetically pushing another horse back with the quick stop hand gesture. A part me cringed with hate because I saw the horse shoot his head up back as he must have felt the energy push him. I realized how much horses have been conditioned this way for generations and it deeply saddens me to see this still happening. I had to let it go.
As Myrna was getting her horse ready, I could tell that Ali, the horse I was about to ride, was trying to feel my energy. She gently held her head close to my body for a few seconds, almost giving me the impression that she was trying to read my energy. It was cool. I got on her and followed Myrna. We got the gate open and off we went. Ali and Oops are sisters and had only been ridden once or twice in the last year. Ali was a bit reluctant in heading in a straight line, so I gently weaved sideways with her until she got the hang of it. I had to use a bit of forceful convincing, which I didn't like to do, but I had no choice if I wanted to get anywhere with this horse. It felt so good being in the moment with the horse. Myrna was coaching me with what she remembered about horseback riding. I was trying to "Ride Every Stride" which is important when you’re sitting on a eight hundred pound animal, not knowing how the animal will act. She asked if my saddle was tight enough and I said: "Ya, it seems Ok."
I noticed the saddle was tilting to the left a bit, but just thought that it was the way it fit on the horse, so I didn’t pay much attention to it. I just wanted to enjoy my ride. We took some pictures of each other and started to head back to the house. I realized my saddle was slipping as I was turning the horse to the right side. I lost my balance and was going down with the saddle. On my way to the ground all these words were racing through my mind.” Which way do I fall so I won't get too banged up or break anything? Help me fall the right way. Crap, I should have checked my saddle. Man, that ground is hard in the winter!” Landing all my weight on my left side and lower back, it knocked the wind out of me. As I was trying to get myself back up, I heard Myrna laughing in the background, saying "Breathe..... I thought that your saddle was getting loose." Meanwhile I was in a lot of pain and a bit embarrassed, while wondering if I'll be able to get back on the horse. I somehow managed to get myself back together and pulled myself back on the horse while telling Myrna she would be doing some healing work on me before I left." No problem" she said. Lesson one was listen to others if they notice your saddle is getting loose. Better safe than sorry. Was my intuition on my way here trying to get my attention? Perhaps.
It was a great ride anyway. I was looking forward to the next time. We got a few pictures and took off the saddles, brushed to horses and I thanked Ali for the ride. We arrived at Myrna's house and she set up the healing table because I could hardly walk. "Thank God for energy work." I thought to myself. She did a chakra connection and opened up my chakras on both feet because they were closed. In the book Vibrational Medicine,
Richard Gerber says,” The chakras are specialized energy centers which connect us to the multidimensional universe. The chakras are dimensional portals within the subtle bodies which take in and process energy of higher vibration so that it may be properly assimilated and used to transform the physical body” (Gerber, Richard. Santa Fe: Bear & Company, 1988, 370)
She commented, “No wonder you fell off, you weren't grounded!" She did some clearing around the area that was in need of attention. "So I was to get on a horse and fall, in order get on the table and grounded? Is that what you’re telling me? OK." I jokingly said. "It's funny how the Universe will put things in my path to get me on this energy table," I told her. Walking out to my truck, I noticed a difference with the treatment. I soaked in Epson Salt bath for half an hour and sat on the heating pad the rest of the night. Next morning, I was a bit surprised how much the pain had diminished but soon realized that the place of impact was still very sensitive to the touch. Because of the healing work, all that I had to show from the fall two days later was a small bruise and a little stiffness. A week later I went for a massage and found out how sensitive I really was in that area. Other than that, I felt like riding as soon as Myrna got back from a convention.
It was January 11. I couldn't get to sleep, and than this deep awareness came to me as I was listening to my harp CD. This thought comes to my mind as to, why am I so deeply passionate about horses all of a sudden. Why did I want to learn and connect with them so much? Now the tears were welling up in my eyes and heart. I was sobbing as I tried to write these feelings down. I was losing my focus on my connection, which is that I feel AT HOME when I'm around them. That's what I was missing. That feeling of total happiness and joy that I'm still hoping I will connect to with the help of the horse spirit. My nose was a mess, my eyes were soaked with tears and I had a feeling of joy in my heart. That week as I was working on a person doing a treatment, I discovered a message. The words," When tears appear, know God is near." I truly was starting to believe and see this, because everyday I felt like I was getting more joyful. My progress seemed to be working by helping me open up more to new people and this was new to me. Around midnight, one night, these words popped in my head and I couldn't sleep until I wrote them down. I reflected on my reason for being here, on Earth, and why I'm here.
The connection was there when I was with the horses as a child, but didn't realize it then All I remembered was that when I was around them I was happier. Then life got in the way. I'm now seeing how my life unfolded in the mist of understanding all this about myself, wanting to know what "loving me" felt like, since I've never really fully felt love for my-self. I remember as a child looking in the mirror and not liking who I saw, because of my smile, bad teeth and pimples etc. I'd mask my self-hate by using comedy to make people laugh so they would like me. Isn’t it funny how the mind works at such a young age? I believe maybe that as a child I was meant to go through this so that I could find my way back Home through the horse's heart. I'm reading about horses and learning about them. I'm eager to learn about what more they can teach me.